Unpublished Straits Times letter by Lucy Davis
Although I have been a member of a number of various civil society organizations for many years and enjoy a relationship of respect for members such as Braema Mathi, Dana Lam, Constance Singam and many others, I have not until now signed on as a member of Aware.
This is because although I support the foundational, progressive values of Aware, I had faith that Aware was doing the good work that it needed to and had enough people in the organization to do this already. I devoted my civil society energies to other causes.
I have however, had occasion to refer a series of very desperate women to Aware for legal and psychological counseling over the years. I would like to highlight two of several cases, which would seem relevant to the current speculation over the new Excos values:
The one breadline income earner and already defacto a single parent, was trying desperately to obtain a divorce from a man who provided no child support but had beaten her up repeatedly over the years kicking her in the stomach while she was pregnant etc but who had now returned to India with no trace.
Another woman was a tertiary student who had become pregnant due to unprotected sex and was utterly terrified of the consequences. She did not dare tell her friends, her family or her Church about this. She was deeply ashamed, had considered suicide and was, when I spoke to her, in the process going online and ordering medication to induce an abortion. I counseled her very strongly not to do this and advised she contact both Aware and a doctor.
I join Aware for this week for the following reasons specific and general:
1) I am concerned over the speculation that behind the gloss of the new Excos pro-family policies are positions that would not permit the first battered wife I previously referred to Aware to obtain a divorce.
2) I am concerned that a pro-abstinence stand in sex education would leave young women such as the student I referred to Aware with even less control over their bodies and in even more desperate circumstances.
3) I am concerned as to the consequences for gay members of Aware and gay members of society that they be pressured, through sexual and religious prejudice into counseling and other ridiculous conversion schemes. I am concerned that Awares previous stance on sexuality as a
choice is in danger.
4) I am concerned for the previous secular values of the organization, now seemingly dominated by persons from extreme denominations of the Christian church.
My other reasons are general and ones of principal:
5) I find the closeted tactics taken by the new Exco and their refusal to come clean on their agenda and ideology abhorrent
6) I feel that this move is not just about Aware but is about protecting spaces in civil society as a whole against the non-democratic forces of religious exclusivity and sexual prejudice.
I look forward to the forthcoming Extra Ordinary AGM where the new Exco will perhaps finally be open as to their agendas on the above issues, why they felt it was necessary to take over so aggressively and also whey they felt they needed to so abruptly remove members such as Braema Mathi from projects in which they were doing such good work.
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